Have you not had a date in years? Or are you tired of dating different men with the same poor results? Are you frightened of entering the dating minefield? Feeling frustrated by “waiting to be found”? Dreading attending another family event alone? Are you confused by men – yet want to marry one? Not sure if you even want to get married? Oh…that question…”WHY are you still single?”?This workshop is for YOU!
How do you experience Mother’s Day? Happy or unhappy?
Today is a celebration of Mother’s Day! ?This might trigger emotions ranging?from poignant?to excruciatingly painful …especially if you’re single.
If you do have children...?Mothers, I commend you for your courage in raising children alone! Motherhood is said to be the most complex job in the world! For some of you as mothers, Mother’s Day is still difficult. That’s for another article.
For the rest of us wonderful women who are without children for any reason. As well as dealing with our internal dialogue?and feelings, we also contend with commercial bombardment, media pressure, comments from “well meaning” friends and family, assumptions from society and platitudes from our faith communities. ?I understand – I’ve experienced all of this too. For me, the reality is – that it is too late for me to give birth physically… it’s a long time since I saw my 40th birthday! I know – I only look 21 😉 Praise the Lord!? Few of us?have the resources of Janet Jackson who gave birth to her first baby aged 50 in January 2017.
Perhaps you don’t have a child anymore, through the loss of your child to death. Or removal?by force through social, economical. or cultural reasons, or deception. Even by termination – no matter what you try to tell yourself.?It’s never easy to be separated from a child that you’ve conceived.
Perhaps you don’t have a child yet.?Are you still living in hope? Extending your faith, fasting, praying, and religiously practising your positive affirmations? Maybe the hope is fading as time passes by or your health is being impaired by fibroids,?endometriosis or?another condition. Or?you’ve not yet met a suitable partner to have a child with. I’ve spoken with dozens of women in this situation over the years. I existed there too for a long time. As I approached 40, it was increasingly challenging to date someone with genuine confidence as the biological clock was ticking so loudly it sometimes drowned the truth of my true intrinsic worth as a woman. I fluctuated between denial and desperation. So much was at steak. Do you feel like you’re living in limbo land? Suspended in hope? Or even?that hope is suspended?
Perhaps it really is too late! Have you longed to hold your child in your arms, but now hope genuine is gone? Do facts dictate that childbirth?it is not physically possible for you? ?There is a grieving process to go through which cannot be hurried. Grieving the loss of your childhood dream and all that it meant for you. Grieving the loss of the hope of being a biological mother, and later a grandmother. The loss of respect from your close community. Yes – some people tend to judge you harshly when you are childless. People hold uninformed assumptions?of childless, women. Even men of the same age group with or without children themselves, even in the church. This can leave you with a sense of shame on top of your devastating grief. They haven’t walked in your shoes.
Recently I found practical resources by Jody Day. I hope you are encouraged too?at?http://gateway-women.com/?Not having children when you long is a very difficult journey. However, with the right support, it’s possible not just to survive, but to thrive. If you’d like to learn more about this please contact?me through my website.?https://janetmcnish.com
Biblical scriptures are woven with God’s compassion.?”He was despised and rejected by men, A Man of sorrows and pain and acquainted with grief; And like One from whom men hide their faces He was despised, and we did not appreciate His worth or esteem Him.” (Isaiah53:3 AMP)
“He heals the brokenhearted and binds us their wounds…” (Psalm 147:3)
“you are precious and honoured in God’s sight and He loves you…” (Isaiah 43:4)
Stay blessed ~ Janet
Fractious -?Easily upset or annoyed or difficult to please, bad-tempered, irritable, moody, unpredictable. Causing problems and disagreement eg: A fractious mother causes a child to walk on eggshells. Never knowing where they stand ? creating anxiety and distress in a child… in some cases trauma.?
A?fractious childhood relates to Adverse?Childhood Experiences (ACEs). On 5th March 2017, I returned as Studio Counsellor to the “Premier Tonight” Show with Presenter Michael Fanstone, to discuss this heartbreaking topic, and to provide advice for the listeners. There were so many calls, emails, and text messages, that we could only respond to about half of them by the end of the two-hour?live show. I felt so sad that there wasn’t enough time, yet so much pain unaddressed in the church community. I couldn’t just leave it there! So, I decided to create a series to unpack this subject in order to share more?understanding of ACEs. ?I will also provide some practical resources and encouragement to empower people?to move towards a more fulfilling life.
Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs) tend to impact people during their childhood and into adulthood. The more of these ACEs a child experiences, the greater risk for health problems in childhood – and into adulthood. Interpersonal relationships are can also be negatively impacted as the ability to trust appropriately is impaired due to the trauma. This can leave someone feeling misunderstood, lonely and isolated. In extreme cases feeling suicidal in the hope the pain will end. However, significant recovery is possible, through effective talking treatments such as counselling or group therapy, psychoeducation, prayer support and gradually participating in a healthy loving community.
As the radio show was on a Christian Radio Station, these blogs will include some biblical examples and case?studies, although the principles are relevant for people of any or non-faith backgrounds – because we are all humans who started off as children.
The Bible has much to say about how children should be cared for, it also provides hope for those who have suffered.
- Fathers, do not provoke?or?irritate?or?exasperate your children [with demands that are trivial or unreasonable or humiliating or abusive; nor by favouritism or indifference; treat them tenderly with loving kindness], so they will not lose heart?and?become discouraged?or?unmotivated [with their spirits broken]. ??Colossians?3:21
- The LORD is near to the brokenhearted And saves those who are crushed in spirit. Psalm 34:18
- He heals the brokenhearted And binds up their wounds. ??Psalm 147:3
PODCAST : PREMIER TONIGHT 5th March 2017: Recovering From A Fractious Childhood follows this post
Holidays got you down? You are not ALONE!
Register for this FREE webinar on Loneliness & Relationships
Janet McNish -?UK
Counsellor, trainer, blogger, ?mentor, radio presenter
Dr?Louky?de Lange – Netherlands
?Dr Isaura Gonzalez – USA
Clinical Psychologist and CEO Latina Mastermind
“I am lonely, yet not everybody will do. I don?t know why,?some people fill the gaps and others emphasise my loneliness”
– Ana?s Nin
Most people will feel lonely at some point in their lives. It?s a deeply personal experience that in most cases will thankfully pass, but for a growing number of people of all ages, loneliness can have a significant impact on their wellbeing. This is especially magnified during the holidays.
This timely, live webinar discusses effective strategies for dealing with the pain of loneliness and isolation.
Presented by two psychologists and a registered counsellor with 55 years of combined experience of helping people transform their relationships, the webinar will highlight steps you can take to move beyond loneliness. This live discussion will include time for Questions & Answers.
Register now! ?https://
Dr?Isaura Gonzalez is founder and CEO of Latina Mastermind. She is dedicated to empowering Latinas by teaching them to stand in their own power as they establish affluence and influence in their respective fields. She is an expert on Diversity and Inclusion having created a work wellness program encompassing civility, disruptive behaviours, emotional intelligence and anger management.
Dr?Gonzalez is a practicing Licensed Psychologist specializing in Clinical Psychology and a Board Certified Coach operating a very successful private practice in New York.
She is the Founder of Latina College Corner, Latinas In Action (LIA) and Co-Founder of Latinos Empowering Others (LEO).
Dr?Gonz?lez holds a Bachelor of Arts in Psychology, a double minor in French and Sociology from Villanova University, a Master of Arts in General-Experimental Psychology, an M. A. and a Psy. D. in Clinical Psychology. She was a 2013 National Hispana Leadership Institute (NHLI) Executive Leadership Program (ELP) fellow and is an alumna of the Harvard University?s Kennedy School of Government Executive Education.
Janet McNish PGDip (MBACP) Reg.
Counsellor, trainer, blogger, professional mentor, radio presenter international public speaker ? ? ? ? ? ? ? Janet?s professional career and personal history make her an intuitive counsellor, with particular expertise in trauma and relationships.
Janet?s professional career and personal history make her an intuitive counsellor, with particular expertise in trauma and relationships. Since earning her Postgraduate Diploma in Counselling in 1998, Janet has co-ordinated 2 mental health projects with SLAM South London And Maudsley Health Trust, and was Clinical Services Director of a Counselling Service managing a team of 20 multicultural Counsellors and Training Program. ?Janet has effectively counselled individuals, couples and groups for 20 years.
A regular media contributor including radio shows since 2007 where she discusses ?Hot Topics? from a Psychological and Existential perspective. Such as BBC World Service, Premier Radio, Ruach Christian Radio, Urban Gospel Network Radio (UGN Jamz), BEN TV. Janet is an engaging speaker at has presented at conferences in London UK, South Africa and USA.
She serves as London Area Co-ordinator for the Association of Christian Counsellors (the national accrediting body providing quality counselling and pastoral care in the UK). Janet professional services are available face to face and by Skype to individuals adults and groups and organisations.
Drs Louky De Lange
Drs. De Lange studied child and adolescent psychology and health psychology. She has worked for someone who has her own practice and they did a lot of research for the Youth Care Office and the Council for Child Protection. She worked at different schools for children with learning difficulties and disruptive behaviour.
In 2008 Drs. De Lange started her own practice and has worked with both children and adults diagnosed with PTSD, depression, anxiety and panic disorders, burn-out, behaviour disorders and learning difficulties. In 2016 she started a global brand in health psychology. Her mission is to connect people to who they truly are, to their core and to focus on their talent and qualities. She focuses on clearing the limiting beliefs, old patterns and changing the mindset of people.
Premier Christian Radio broadcasts on:
London: MW 1305, 1332, 1413 ?
Nationally:Freeview Channel 725 and D.A.B.
PREMIER TONIGHT: Michael Fanstone & Studio Counsellor Janet McNish discuss?Loneliness and Isolation?Janet responds to calls & messages LIVE ON AIR with understanding and advice.
CHRISTMAS IS COMING – How can we reduce our loneliness during the holiday season??Loneliness is no respecter of persons; you could be male or female, introvert or extrovert, young or elderly, married, single, successful in your career (consider Michael Jackson, Peaches Geldof, Amy Winehouse ?) beautiful, wealthy, unwell, at peak of fitness?
What is loneliness? What is isolation? What is alone? What is solitude? ?When is alone good?
Causes of loneliness??How loneliness impacts your health physically and mentally.
How can you overcome loneliness and isolation? How has loneliness affected you? How have you overcome it??
PREMIER TONIGHT: Michael Fanstone & Studio Counsellor Janet McNish discussed the epidemic of Loneliness and Isolation?Janet responded to calls & messages LIVE ON AIR with understanding and some practical solutions.
LONELINESS AND ISOLATION.?Loneliness is no respecter of persons; you could be male or female, introvert or extrovert, young or elderly, married, single, successful in your career (consider Michael Jackson, Peaches Geldof, Amy Winehouse …) beautiful, wealthy, unwell, at peak of fitness…
What is loneliness? What is isolation? What is alone? What is solitude? ?
Causes of loneliness??How loneliness impacts your health.
How can I overcome loneliness and isolation? How has loneliness affected you?
Or copy this link into your browser:? [mixcloud]https://www.mixcloud.com/radioshows1/premier-tonight-michael-fanstone-with-janet-mcnish-4-september-2016/[/mixcloud]
Janet and Patricia are joined by Cindy Griffiths who openly shared her amazing story of forgiveness.
Cindy described how she is able to forgive the drunk driver who took the lives of her daughter and mother.
How her faith in God helped her through the tragedy.
Resident studio counsellor Janet McNish talks to Patricia Benjamin about the horrific topic of human trafficking. They explore how to pull through from the harrowing ordeal of being forced or enticed into sex slavery.
How to show more empathy towards victims of human trafficking.
Studio Counsellor ~Janet McNish?
Premier Christian Radio broadcasts on:
MW 1305, 1332, 1413 in London
Nationally on Freeview Channel 725 and D.A.B.
PREMIER TONIGHT with Michael Fanstone & Janet McNish discussed the topic of Sexual Abuse & Recovery. Janet and Michael responded to calls & messages LIVE ON AIR with compassion and practical solutions.
MOVING ON FROM SEXUAL ABUSE
- What is sexual abuse?
- 1 in 4 girls and 1 in 7 boys in have been sexually abused by aged 18 in UK.
- Who are the abusers?
- Abuse and restoration in the bible
- Impact of abuse individuals
- Betrayal, shame, powerlessness, anger,?forgiveness?!?
- Insights for recovery
- How to support someone effectively
- Helpful resources and contacts?
Do you have any questions or comments on this topic? Please leave a comment or message below. We?look forward to hearing from you.